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Good morning,
Football season is officially underway, Spooky Season is warming up on the sidelines, and for the next seven weeks America will be yelling at people wearing masks for two completely different reasons.
So grab the wings, check the waiver wire, and keep in mind:
If your quarterback says “I’ll be right back”… you’re not watching a game, you’re watching a horror movie.
🩸TODAY’S TERROR — THE PARKING GARAGE NIGHTMARE
You parked on Level 3.
You know you parked on Level 3.
You remember the big yellow 3 painted on the wall.
Except your car isn't there.
No problem. You probably parked on the other side.
You walk past a Honda.
A concrete pillar.
A shopping cart.
Another Honda.
No car.
Maybe it was Level 4.
You take the stairs up.
Same Honda.
Same concrete pillar.
Different shopping cart.
Still no car.
Now you're clicking the key fob every six feet like you're sending sonar into the darkness.
BEEP BEEP.
Nothing.
You go back down to Level 3.
Wasn't that pillar yellow before?
BEEP BEEP.
Somewhere in the distance—
BEEP BEEP.
Your car!
You hurry toward the sound.
Turn the corner.
Toyota.
Not yours.
You check your phone.
You've been looking for seventeen minutes.
And that's when it hits you:
You may never have owned a car.
You may have always lived here.
Today’s Terror: Because after fifteen minutes, a parking garage is just the Backrooms with validation.
P.S. Your car is on Level 2.
🩸RECENT HORROR NEWS
Zach Cregger Took the Jokes Out of Resident Evil
Ahead of next week's release, director/co-writer Zach Cregger revealed that early test audiences liked his new Resident Evil — but liked it more after he removed much of the comedy. The film's all-new story follows a medical courier whose night goes catastrophically sideways.
Zombies 1. Punchlines 0.
Another Internet Horror Creator Gets the Keys to Hollywood
Horror creator Spencer Lackey, who built a huge audience making short-form scares online, is writing and directing his first feature, Lust, with Neon, Blumhouse Atomic Monster and Spooky Pictures behind it.
That's worth watching if you create horror. The pipeline from make scary stuff yourself → build an audience → make a feature is looking less like an anomaly and more like an actual career path.
Somewhere, a film-school application just quietly tossed itself in the trash.
Mike Flanagan Has a Case of Rot
Mike Flanagan and Red Room Pictures are producing Rot, the feature directorial debut of Alexandra Magistro. The film follows an antisocial man haunted by his hoarder mother's death who becomes a trauma cleaner — where apparently the job description includes things beginning to infest your mind.
Most people clean out their parents' garage and find old Christmas decorations. This guy gets body horror.
Beyond Fest Just Became Horror Christmas
Beyond Fest announced a monster 81-film lineup running September 24–October 6 in Los Angeles. Among the goodies: the world premiere of V/H/S/MIXTAPE, Victorian Psycho, the first two episodes of Mike Flanagan's Carrie, a Robert Eggers marathon — with Eggers showing first-look footage from Werwulf — plus a long-awaited restoration of Ken Russell's The Devils.
Eighty-one movies. Finally, a film festival that understands sleep is for romantic comedies.
🩸TAKE THE GRUDGE POLL
At What Age Did Horror First Betray You?
🩸 T- BONE’S TOP MOVIE PICKS
This week T-Bone tackles vampire movies. Not just vampires, but foreign indie vampire movies. Do you have a favorite? T-Bone has a few. Find out what you need to be watching right here.
🩸NEWSWORTHY NUMBER
7
It took seven days to shoot the shower scene in Psycho.
Seven days.
For a sequence that lasts only about 45 seconds.
Hitchcock used 78 camera setups and 52 cuts to create it — and the stabbing sound came courtesy of a casaba melon.
Name the movie below
Name the movie. Answer at the bottom ⬇️⬇️⬇️
🩸THE LAST HAUNTED RIDE — SPOOK-A-RAMA
As kids growing up in The Bronx, my brother and I could think of no better way to spend our summer days than at Coney Island in Brooklyn. It was our Disneyland covered with a patina of danger. There was one ride, one haunted house ride that we visited again and again, back-to-back-to-back. We knew the ride by heart. It couldn’t have been scary, and yet it was our favorite spooky treat. Return with me now to those thrilling days of yesteryear as we re-visit the last haunted attraction in Coney Island.
🩸HORROR IN THEATERS.
Hope — (Sept. 9th) The film centers on a village police chief and his rookie deputy who must defend his local Korean community from a mysterious creature after wildfires sever all communications… Turns out “no signal” was the good news. Trailer
Don’t Move — (Sept.11th) A church group's retreat in the Ozark wilderness goes haywire when they enter the wrong part of the forest. They are hunted by a giant, prehistoric arachnid that tracks its prey through vibration… playing dead is so much harder when all you want to do is scream. Trailer
Black Zombie — (Sept. 11th) This limited release documentary examines the historical and cultural roots of the zombie and its connection to Haiti… Seems zombies were not created by RAGE.
Onslaught — (Sept. 4th) An Army sniper unleashes her lethal skills to protect her young daughter from a rogue squad of genetically engineered soldiers… Terminating Terminators.
Ever After — (Sept. 4th limited) A bachelorette weekend at a remote forest lodge runs into homicidal lunatics who believe they're characters from fairy tales…
Horror icons (including Malcolm McDowell) unite in this fairytale-inspired horror. Trailer
Coming Soon
Resident Evil — (Sept. 18) Zach Cregger (Barbarian, Weapons) takes his swing at the legendary franchise with an entirely new story starring Austin Abrams as a medical courier who picks one spectacularly bad night to go to work... Finally, proof that “your package is out for delivery” doesn’t mean it will arrive—ever! Trailer
Who’s Watching — (Sept. 18th) Digital and select theaters. Writer-director Tim Kasher's psychological horror thriller follows an aspiring filmmaker who becomes obsessed with a coworker and secretly begins documenting her life… A reminder that sometimes the red flag is holding a camera.
Victorian Psycho — (Sept. 25th) A governess arrives at a remote Gothic mansion with a questionable past, questionable employers, and an increasingly unquestionable appetite for violence… Mary Poppins, if Mary Poppins had bodies to hide.
Keep an eye out for
Other Mommy — (Oct. 9th) A grieving family encounters a sinister maternal presence that has very specific ideas about who should be raising the children… It appears, one mother isn’t terrifying enough.
Clayface — (Oct. 23rd) Body horror film based on the eponymous character from DC Comics.
Every headline satisfies an opinion. Except ours.
Remember when the news was about what happened, not how to feel about it? 1440's Daily Digest is bringing that back. Every morning, they sift through 100+ sources to deliver a concise, unbiased briefing — no pundits, no paywalls, no politics. Just the facts, all in five minutes. For free.
🩸HORROR TO WATCH ON STREAMERS
What’s Worth The Watch — a mix of hidden gems, buzzy titles, comfort horror, underseen picks, and classics worth revisiting
“Sleep Is Apparently Cancelled”
Parasomnia — Streaming on: Shudder
Riley has spent years battling night terrors, but things get considerably worse when her best friend disappears and she begins to suspect the demonic figure stalking her dreams has figured out how to follow her into the real world…Suddenly doomscrolling until 2 A.M. feels like preventative medicine.
“Worst. Missionary Visit. Ever”
Heretic — Streaming On: Hulu
Two young missionaries knock on Hugh Grant's door and discover that theology gets considerably less academic once he locks it. Scott Beck and Bryan Woods turn conversation into a weapon, while Grant weaponizes being Hugh Grant. New to Hulu September 8.
“The Love Boat, But Dracula”
The Last Voyage of the Demeter — Streaming On: Peacock
Dracula's infamous voyage to England becomes a full-blown creature feature as something starts thinning out the ship's crew. André Øvredal's movie didn't find much love theatrically, but this feels like a perfect Spooky Season second chance.
“The Ghost Has Camera Privileges”
Presence — Streaming On: Tubi
Steven Soderbergh shoots a haunted-house story from the ghost's point of view, watching Lucy Liu's family slowly come apart from inside their new home. Clever, restrained and much stranger than your standard “why don't these people just move?” movie.
Comfort Pick Of The Week
“Never Trust a Banker. Especially This One”
Drag Me to Hell — Streaming On: Peacock
Sam Raimi gives us curses, bodily fluids, demonic livestock and one extremely persistent old woman. Mean, funny, gross and gleefully committed to ruining Alison Lohman's week.
Sometimes comfort horror means wrapping yourself in a blanket.
Sometimes it means watching Sam Raimi throw somebody around a room.
🩸FINAL SIP
Football is back. Horror season has begun.
So spend your weekend screaming at the television.
For whatever reason you choose. 🏈🤖👀
Horror Movie Trivia Answer: Halloween (1978)
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